Reflections 2020: How God led me to Hope Church Singapore

Thank you, Covid-19, for pulling me back indoors so that I have time to ponder and write again. Many have asked me how did I land up in Hope Church Singapore and I always struggle to give a concise answer; simply because there were so many things that happened in sovereign succession that led me to where I am in Hope Singapore today.

Let me flip the pages of my memories and attempt to paint you a comprehensive picture of God's grace and also hope to reveal a little bit of how He writes His story.

Rewind back to 2015, when I just left Heart of God Church - you can read more about it here - https://historymakers-jonnyboy.blogspot.com/2015/01/my-heart-of-god-church-experience.html

I was working in People's Association (PA) then which involved me working weekends, so my usual weekend time-slot meant for church was now given to the government. Since my weekends were occupied with work - a legit reason not to go church - I became a church-less Christian for about 2 years.

I did church-hop during those 2 wilderness years of my journey of faith but it's fundamentally different from actually settling down in a church, joining a life/cell group, serving in the church and growing with the community that God placed you in. So, I'd count that whole period as "church-less". Haha.

But God was orchestrating my return to His community of believers. It began in 26 Oct 2016 through His (cute) servant cum child of God, Nicole Han. If you're wondering how do I even remember the exact date - there ya go, a WhatsApp screenshot.

Wild Nicole popped up in my WhatsApp after 3 years!

Yeah you saw that right, we knew each other since 2013 and we had very fond memories because we met while on our university exchange programme - in Shanghai, China. Here's a (cute) photo of her (and me) outside Thanksgiving English Fellowship (TEF) church in Shanghai - a church which we attended during our 6-month exchange stint.

Outside Thanksgiving English Fellowship Church (TEFC) - our Shanghai church during our 6 month exchange

She's cute right? I shall not bracket that anymore HAHA. That was my first reaction when I saw her actually. HAHA. Guys in Hope Church, you still got chance ok? As of now I think she's still single 😆 But the key to her heart is in God's hands my dear brothers - she is indeed a very spiritual woman-of-God whom I deeply respect. In short, you gotta find God first, get the key (to her heart, that's in God's hands) from Him, then you got chance. HAHA

Ok cute-ness aside, she's actually studying in SMU (Singapore Management University) while I was studying in NTU (Nanyang Technological University). We were both from different universities and on different exchange programs! So how on earth did we meet?

Let me now introduce you to our (also cute) mutual friend, Jaslyn Wong. We go way back to our youth-hood days in Bethel Assembly of God's Youth Alive - the church I grew up in. That's how we knew each other.

One of the first few photos we took in Shanghai

My NTU exchange in Shanghai started a few months earlier than SMU's. So about 1-2 months into my exchange, Jaslyn's mom, Aunty Lay Hoon, texts me and asks me to help her daughter find accommodation in Shanghai.

I tried but failed. LOL. The apartment I was staying in, is handed down from our seniors, so I have no idea how to go about finding an apartment to rent without getting scammed by these 中国人.

Anyhow, Jaslyn managed to rent an apartment with the help of another friend who's working in Shanghai. So when she touched down, we all met up and that's how I got to know Nicole Han.

With the SMU clique at Uncle Ronnie's house. Good times.

Uncle Ronnie and Uncle Coleman as mentioned in the chat above are church members in TEFC (Thanksgiving English Fellowship Church) - and we are in their cell group. Photo above is where we had dinner at Uncle Ronnie's place.

Group photo again with the SMU peeps with Uncle Ronnie and wife ( ͡ᵔ ͜ʖ ͡ᵔ ) This is our last get-together before our exchange semester was over༼ つ ಥ_ಥ ༽つ

Last cell group gathering in Shanghai ಥ_ಥ

Alright, let me stop reminiscing those carefree university-exchange days in Shanghai, if not I'd be pouring out a truckload of photos. HAHA.

In summary, Nicole and I met during exchange in Shanghai through a mutual friend, Jaslyn. Finish. HAHA.

After our exchange program ended in Jun/Jul 2013, it was back to school and life went back to normal - Nicole would continue her course in SMU and I would go on to finish mine in NTU, and we would never meet again. Or so I thought.

Our convo blossomed into quite a long one

Our WhatsApp conversation then progresses with me telling her that I'm church-less. Like any good Christian girl, she instinctively invites me to her church - Hope Singapore.

But at that time, I was still pretty jaded with church, since the 1st and 2nd church that I attended have left me bruised. You can read more about that in my Thir.st-featured article here: https://thir.st/blog/the-church-is-not-perfect-but-it-is-beautiful/

With my jadedness with the church came the defensive questions below. Questions that pin-pointed the key things that I didn't like in Heart of God Church

She gave a beautiful response. And she's not the Life Group Leader (LGL). But I could hear her hope and I could feel her gentle invitation to come back to church.

She then proceeds to invite me many times to church and LG (life group; aka cell/church/connect group) but time and again I wouldn't be free due to work.

For once, I'm the "pre-believer" being invited by my Christian friend to church. HAHA. What a role-reversal! LOL. Now I know how it feels like to be invited to church again and again. It isn't a bad feeling really. In fact, it kinda makes me feel wanted - like I'm some big shot and you want my presence. LOL. I hope that's what my friends feel when I invite them relentlessly (^̮^)

With each rejection, I felt bad-er / paiseh-er / guilty-er. I think I wasn't free or didn't turn up for like 3-4 times? As per WhatsApp screenshot below. HAHA. But, finally, I made it. I visited Hope Church and hung out with her LG after service.

Nicole's persistent invite (ง'̀-'́)ง

What she didn't know is that, during my 2-year churchless-wilderness season, I did church-hop for a bit and then gave up totally because those visits didn't re-ignite my love and passion for God.

So I actually told God:
"I'm not going to try to come back to church anymore. I don't want to do it in my own strength and in my own timing.
If you want me back in church, I believe You will bring me back in your own fashion and perfect timing."

Therefore, I wasn't even trying to fit God into my schedule. That's why whenever work stuff pops up, I'd choose work over church - and that resulted in me rejecting Nicole's invite for like 4-5 times?

But bless her heart because she was RELENTLESS. She invited me every week without fail until I came to church. I believe that is the heart of God - He is always gently inviting us and waiting for us to come back to Him like in the parable of the Prodigal Son.

So I attended Hope Church with Nicole Han and her LG for a few weeks, but I didn't connect that well with them though.

Me snapchat-ing one of Hope Church's services

Because her LG members are mostly graduates from Australian universities and they were mostly talking and chatting with their Aussie accent (some of 'em HAHA) about their experiences in Australia and stuff.

And here I am, an NTU graduate with a totally different university experience trying to mingle. Picture that. For 3-4 weeks that I went. Yep.

So, eventually, I stopped going to Hope Church

BUT, Nicole's invite didn't stop. She's truly a warrior of the faith. We need more Christians like her. Really.

I decided to go to Hope Church for one last time in December 2016 for the Christmas service - the most boomz time of the year to go to church; because that's when they'll put on their best show - extravagant productions and heart-wrenching video testimonies and all. LOL. Yes, I have in fact been a part of all these in my 30 years of being a Christian.

Before going for my "last" service in Hope Church, I told God:
"I will ONLY stay in Hope Church IF You meet me there during service"

And so I went, for what became the most powerful service for me in 2 years of being church-less. It was unexpected - because I've been there for like 4 times already with Nicole Han's LG.

And the funny part is - the theme of the Christmas service is "The Great Unexpectation". Pretty fitting theme in my opinion. HAHA.

I was blown away by the Christmas drama production. The skit was called "Train to Bishan" - a witty adaptation of the title of the popular "Train to Busan", Korean zombie-horror movie that year.

I still remember the drama vividly. It starts with a scene of an MRT train cabin with 3 or 4 characters on it. (By the way, the graphics of the MRT train and sound effects were super on-point.) Then the MRT train breaks down and the passengers start worrying about their personal consequences.

So the spotlight shines on the student (while the rest of the cast freezes in the dark) and the student begins to share about how he will be late for his exams, fail it, and not make it to the university of his dreams. Because of that, he will not meet his well-educated & pretty university girlfriend and will not get married...and there will be no kids for his parents to hug.

The exaggerated lines and acting drew huge guffaws from the congregation. It's funny because those worries are true - or rather, it reflects the worry of every Singaporean and poses the question "What if I don't make the societal norm?"

The spotlight then shifted to this girl in her 20s who got a call on the train from the doctor telling her she had cancer. Her whole world came crashing down right in the midst of the MRT breakdown.

Then the spotlight shifted to the other characters and they discharged their script and acting flawlessly. (I can't remember what the rest said LOL)

After the drama skit was done, a huge round of applause followed and senior pastor Jeffrey Chong walks up to the stage and delivers his sermon powerfully.

His sermons are always salted with a lot of jokes and peppered with a lot of relatable stories and illustrations.

At this juncture, I was already mind-blown by the drama production and the simple-yet-cutting sermon...But I wasn't prepared for the final blow.

My snapchat of the stage scene after the drama production

With his hands clasped, Ps Jeff then asked the audience "you remember the girl in the skit that got cancer? It's a true story. Here is her testimony..." He then walks off stage and this testimony-documentary starts playing.

I was rekt. You can read more about her story below at the URL and watch the 2 videos featuring her story below. Take a tissue box with ya.

https://thir.st/blog/planning-get-married-got-cancer/

The other video testimony made by Hope Church Singapore, which I feel is more moving, is in the URL below. I'm not sure why the Facebook embed code doesn't work. Probably because Google doesn't like Facebook. LOL.
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1342318445821927

After being rekt emotionally by the video testimony, I was also rekt spiritually by the altar call. As they were singing the worship songs, tears just cascaded down my face as the Holy Spirit came and paid me a visit right there and then.

He took me back in time as I was standing there sobbing with my eyes shut: I saw an impression of myself in my younger days, kneeling in the prayer room of my first church - Bethel Assembly of God. And scene after scene flashed past my mind from then till where I am now and I felt that the Holy Spirit was trying to tell me "I am with you through it all".

At that instant, I knew God had answered my earlier statement to Him
"I will stay in Hope Church ONLY if You meet me there during service"

And there He was. Right here. Assuring me that He is the God of my yesterdays, the God of my today and the God of my forever. I knew right there and then that Hope Church is where He wanted me to be.

Right after that service, it was business as usual - lunch with Nicole Han's LG, head home, sleep and prepare for the upcoming Christmas events at Tampines North CC and get on with the daily grind.

Then came the new year. Yay. I didn't go back to church at all ever since 2017 began. Then came Feb 2017 and I was kinda missing Nicole's invitation to church. Yeah, she stopped inviting me already. Haha. Guess her transition to working life and adults service sapped her energy and time. So this time, I took the initiative. LOL.

Just when I started taking baby steps to go church, my Hope Church momma wasn't around sobs ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

But this was exactly in God's plan. He knew that I didn't fit in well with Nicole's LG so He led me to another.

This "uni friend of mine" that asked me to bring him to Hope Church was my NTU ODAC junior. I knew another of my ODAC junior attending Hope Church so I contacted her and I finally stepped back into Hope Church again in Apr 2017.

April 2017. That was 3 months after my big encounter with God in Hope Church's Christmas 2016 service.

So, technically, you can say that I left Hope Church, AGAIN, for 3+ months. LOL.

Anyway, that NTU ODAC junior friend of mine in Hope Church is Gillian Wong. Here's a GIF of her to properly introduce her to you HAHA (~˘▾˘)~

Snapchat vid I took during one of the Saturday services we attended

She then introduced me to her NTU life group (LG) and I got on well with them. Conversations flowed freely as we talked about our university life and experiences.

I also met up with another key person in my journey to staying in Hope church - Gillian's LGL (Life Group Leader) - Siqi Wong.

These 2 Wongs - Gillian and Siqi Wong - were the final 2 ladies (not counting Zinky that is LOL) the good Lord used to plant me in Hope church.

Since I was comfortable with this NTU LG, I began going to church more regularly as I now have a community of friends to look forward to meeting and also a bunch of believers to check-in on me whenever I didn't turn up for church. Haha.

Some of the NTU LG members came to support my emcee stint in Steword's Riverboat restaurant!
From left: Gillian, Ming Xuan, Yan Xiang, Me, Ernie, Elvis

I truly enjoyed this LG's energy, joy and love for each other. I even had a sleepover with them at Ernie's aunt's house. There we played games, played pool and watched movie till we all KO-ed one by one. Haha. I managed to dig out the snapchat video of it LOL.

I was "planted enough" until I even brought friends to Hope church! One of them, my NTU ODAC junior, Shan Wen, is still in my LG today! Here's a pic of one the first few times she came to Hope church:

From left: Gillian, Shan Wen, Me and Elvis (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ Fun fact: Like me, Shan Wen used to attend Heart of God Church too

Just when I thought things were going well, and my journey in Hope church is firm and on-track now, guess what? 

This NTU LG will be disbanded...

...Or rather, the LG will be re-grouped because after May, several of the LG members will be graduating from NTU and moving on to adults service.

To follow Gillian to her new NTU LG will be weird because...all the undergrads will be intro-ing themselves, saying their year in NTU and course of study and I'll be like:

Jon: Hi I'm Jonavan, EEE year 7. (ʘ‿ʘ)

NTU LG members: (⚆ _ ⚆) (◉_◉) (ಠ_ಠ)

Life Group Leader: Hmm, shouldn't you be in adults service then?

Also, the NTU LGs have their life group meetings in NTU itself...so for me to travel all the way from Tampines to Pulau NTU for a 2-hour LG is insane.

With that, I told the NTU LG that I'll send an SMS to Hope church's system for them to randomly assign me to a young adult's LG in Tampines. They were all supportive and told me to keep them posted - in case that doesn't land me in an LG that is suitable for me. Aww, such good follow-up from everyone - not just the leaders (^̮^)

Not long after I sent the SMS, an LGL leading one of the Tampines young adults life group contacted me. We had a nice chat, but to my horror...their LG meets every Wednesday night. Wednesday nights are my night shift slot (1pm-10pm). Yes, I was still working in People's Association, Tampines North CC at that time.

This means that I'm unable to join them for LG.
Which is equivalent to not being able to join their LG

At this juncture, I'm like "赢了咯! You see ah God, don't say I never try ah. You tell me Hope church is the place for me ok swee. First, I try Nicole Han's LG for a few months then buey sai. Second, I go Gillian Wong's NTU LG I ok with...最后 needa disband then also buey sai. Third, now Hope church system assign me the LG ALSO BUEY SAI. Wa. 真的赢了咯!"

This is where the 2nd "Wong" stepped in to save the day - Ms. Siqi Wong. She WhatsApp-ed me at a divine timing:

You can say that from here onwards, the rest is history. I met up with the other 3 LG members - yes it was a newly-formed life group - we had a nice chat and from there, grew in number. Here's the group photo of my very first time attending Hope church's LG:

From left: Ruo Ting, Joseph Lee (aka Joe), Siqi Wong and me (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

At that time our LG is called Tampines 9 if I remember correctly. Haha. It's already 3 years since our very first LG meeting! Wew. We were all young adults staying in Tampines and most of us have just descended into this deep, dark abyss called "the working world".

From there, more young adults that just graduated from uni or looking for a life group in the east joined our LG.

Next addition was Nicole followed by Yi Qin (who later became our LGL) (づ｡◕‿◕｡)づ

More and more people were joining our LG. Some of us brought our friends, some were new transfers from the university groups and some are new believers that just joined Hope church. Reminds me of the bible verse in Acts 2:47b "...And the Lord added to the church daily those who were being saved."

Our original Tampines 9 LG evolved into Tampines East 5!

I was once again planted in the body of Christ - this time in Hope church. And thanks to Covid-19, I now have the time to look back and remember how it was all so different just 3 years ago for me - where I was jaded with the church and filling up my weekends with my work in PA and also my work as an emcee and performer for events.

Another group photo with TE5 at Changi Jewel's Rain Vortex (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ

Yes I was making good money in PA and from doing my freelance hosting, but all those burnt weekends - devoid of not just social but spiritual activity - was killing the man inside of me.

To my Facebook friends, colleagues and acquaintances, it looked like I was doing well - always posting on Instagram, photos with Mr. Baey - my political boss in PA, photos of me hosting weddings, events and roadshows, photos of me traveling overseas, etc. but deep down, I was a soul that was bankrupt.

Bankrupt because I'm just like every other non-Christian, average Singaporean on the street - working hard, doing well, looking good, doing all the correct things a good citizen would. Invisible. Purposeless. Just another ephemeral face in the crowd.

We have worked ourselves numb. The daily grind has become the meaning of our existence. When people ask us "What are you doing now?", we smile, take a deep breath and say things like:

- "I'm a teacher in St. Hilda's Secondary School" (or any other government agency)
- "I'm an auditor in KPMG" (or any of the big four)
- "I'm a banker in DBS" (or any of the big banks with offices in Singapore)
- "I'm a design engineer in ST Electronics" (or any other engineering firms)
- "I'm a process engineer in Global Foundries" (or any other semiconductor firm)
- "I'm a financial advisor with Prudential" (or any other insurance or real estate firm)
- "I'm a structural engineer in Keppel FELS" (or any other oil & gas firm)
- "I'm in my 1st year of houseman-ship with SGH" (or any other healthcare firm)
- "I'm an associate attorney in Wong Partnership" (or any other law firm)
- "I'm an outdoor sales manager in DB Schenker" (or any other logistics firm)
- ...I could go on, you get the point.

We wear our jobs on our sleeves and become defined by what we are paid to do. Our identity has become so tied to our jobs that sometimes, we forget that we have a soul, that we have a spirit, that whatever we're doing isn't truly satisfying our being.

For those 2-3 church-less years, I was that bankrupt soul. I might be happy, but I wasn't joyful. I might be successful, but it wasn't significant. I'm just like any other Christ-less soul on the street.

Post-baptism group photo with one of our new members - Nicholas Poh! Like me, he was also from Heart of God church.

To be honest it's really easy to get carried away with the current (浪) of life. You just go day-by-day, working hard, grinding the 8-5, living life by default and not by design.

It takes a tragedy like Covid-19, or the death of your parent / boy(girl)friend / spouse / best friend, or a sickness like cancer, or an injury like a broken foot, or a break-up with your boyfriend/girlfriend, etc. to make us stop in our tracks and really look deep and assess what life is about.

So, when I stepped back into church and let the Holy Spirit speak, my Spirit-man awakens, and I begin to see with spiritual eyes - like Neo in the Matrix and like Truman when we walked out of the Truman Show set - I am woke, I come alive. And then we go on to share our experiences and grow together was a family, as a church, as a body of Christ.

Ever since I've been planted in Hope church, I've been serving again too. I help to lead worship, lead games, play the guitar for LG, I acted in 2 Christmas drama productions and I recently joined the worship team as an electric guitarist (again LOL) - I'll be writing more on these in a separate "reflections 2020" post.

All these sacrifices and offerings that we make in church might seem small and insignificant; but remember, they're not for the world to see, but for God to see - and He shall be the judge of our works.

Building God's eternal, unshakeable kingdom beats building my own transient, fragile kingdom hands-down, anytime. So, where else shall I be found? In the house of God.

So this is the story of how I landed up in Hope Church Singapore. And God's not finished yet.